My page is dedicated to all the moms out there who have no idea what the hell they’re doing but are trying their best just the same. It’s for the current mom, old mom, past mom and wannabe mom who get that children are a blessing but they’re also kinda the worst.
My name is Adriana and I am Red For Thought. Follow me on my journey to a wonderfully messed up motherhood!
I am officially 30 years old. I’ve contemplated Botox but I’m scared of needles. I absolutely must sleep with a heating pad on my stomach but the room temperature needs to be freezing. I’ve been married for 5ish years and am the mother of two sons. I have two brothers, one older, one younger, and I still live at my parent’s house. I have red hair, which is where the name came from, and I’m extremely outspoken but oddly introverted. My family is my life and even though I can sound like I don’t like them; I really really do. I am Adriana.
Santiago Sr. (Santiago, Puffin)
Santiago is my Puffin Boo and we’re obsessed with each other. We are in it to win it. He hates being on social media but loves to use my phone to see what other people are up to. He’s reserved when necessary and secretly hilarious. He cares not what people think of him and he marches to the beat of his own drum. He is obsessed with his kids and having full-time help. This is Santiago Sr.
Santiago Jr. (Santi)
My first-born son, the ultimate proof of love at first sight and the reason I am a mom. He is also the reason I’m half insane and don’t sleep. He outruns his father and me and laughs as he does it. He now hates to take pictures and loves to eat cake. He is obsessed with Mamma Mia and thinks yelling at the top of his lungs is super cool. He is both hilarious and a monster and I wouldn’t change a thing about him. This is Santiago Jr.
My baby. I swore this one would be a girl. I was sure of it. But here he is, penis and all. He is my “macho de mami” and he’s a butterball. He smiles when I walk into the room and cries when he’s done drinking his milk. I look deep into his beautiful baby blue eyes and I can’t believe he is mine. He sits up, crawls, likes to throw diapers on the floor when he’s on the changing table and has the most kissable cheeks and inner thighs I’ve ever seen. I’m also a little sad because he seems to enjoy the nanny’s company more than mine but you win some you loose some. This is Joaquin.
Oh my mother… she’s half my mom, half my little sister. She tells on me to my dad and Puffin but will drop anything to hang out with me or my boys. She says she loves them equally but is oddly obsessed with Santi. She steals my purses, jewelry and ideas and does it with a mischievous smirk. She has weird rules in the house but still lets me live with her, so I’ll take it. This is Mama.
My father hates social media and doesn’t understand people’s obsession with taking photos. He hides M&M’s in his office and “secretly” gives them to Santi, even when I ask him not to. He hates small chairs in restaurants and will never sit outside. He loves the Bahamas but hates the beach. He’s a complex fellow, guys. He cannot be described, he needs to be experienced. This is Papa.
Bebo and Andres
I have two brothers, Bebo and Andres. They’ve both abandoned me to live in NYC and they don’t even live together. One is an engineer and the other is in finance. They take my opinion super seriously and they both make fun of me for completely different reasons. I don’t think I know anyone on this earth funnier than them. This is Bebo and Andres.